The Secret to Happiness: What Really Makes a Life Fulfilling
by Gillis - September 2024
What is the secret to happiness?
It is a question people have asked for thousands of years. We often assume the answer must be something we can acquire: more money, a better career, a bigger house, more travel, or greater success.
But decades of research suggest that happiness is more complicated than simply getting more of what we want. A fulfilling life tends to involve strong relationships, a sense of purpose, good health, financial security, meaningful activities, and time spent doing things that matter to us.
These ideas become especially important as you approach retirement. Retirement gives you something that can be difficult to create during your working years: more control over your time. The challenge is figuring out how to use that time in a way that creates a satisfying life.
There Probably Isn't One Secret to Happiness
Happiness isn't a single emotion that you achieve permanently. Everyone experiences stress, disappointment, grief, boredom, and difficult periods.
A better way to think about happiness is overall well-being: feeling that your life has meaning, that you have people you care about, that you are engaged in activities you value, and that you have enough stability to enjoy your life.
That distinction matters because it changes the question from "How can I be happy all the time?" to "How can I build a life that is generally meaningful and satisfying?"
Relationships May Be the Most Important Ingredient
One of the most interesting findings from long-running happiness research is the importance of relationships.
The Harvard Study of Adult Development began in the late 1930s and has followed participants and, over time, their families for more than eight decades. Researchers have repeatedly found that the quality of people's relationships is closely connected with their health and well-being.
The lesson isn't that you need hundreds of friends. A small number of meaningful relationships can be much more valuable than having a huge social network.
Family, close friends, neighbours, community groups, volunteer organizations, and other social connections can all provide opportunities for companionship and support.
Retirement Can Change Your Social Network
Work provides a built-in social structure for many people. You see coworkers, have conversations, solve problems together, and share experiences.
When you retire, those interactions can disappear almost overnight. That's one reason social planning deserves as much attention as financial planning.
Before you retire, think about where your regular social interaction will come from afterward. You might join a club, volunteer, take classes, participate in sports, spend more time with family, or develop new friendships.
Purpose Gives Retirement Direction
A job provides more than a paycheque. It can give you goals, responsibilities, structure, recognition, and a reason to get up every morning.
That's why retirement can sometimes feel surprisingly difficult. You may have achieved your financial goal, only to discover that you haven't decided what you want your days to look like.
A sense of purpose doesn't have to come from paid employment. Purpose can come from family, volunteering, mentoring, creative projects, learning, community involvement, hobbies, or helping others.
Research continues to find an association between having a greater sense of purpose in life and better long-term health outcomes. A 2026 meta-analysis covering 25 samples and nearly 489,000 participants found that greater purpose in life was associated with lower mortality risk, although the research is observational and does not prove that purpose itself causes longer life.
Health and Happiness Are Connected
It is difficult to enjoy retirement if poor health prevents you from doing the things you want to do.
Physical activity, adequate sleep, nutritious food, preventive healthcare, and maintaining social connections can all contribute to overall well-being.
Exercise is particularly interesting because the evidence has developed considerably since many of the older studies commonly cited online. A 2024 systematic review and network meta-analysis of randomized trials found that several forms of exercise—including walking or jogging, strength training, yoga, and mixed aerobic exercise—were associated with reductions in depressive symptoms among people with major depression.
Exercise should not be viewed as a universal replacement for professional medical or mental-health care. But regular physical activity can be an important part of a healthy lifestyle.
Financial Security Matters Too
Money isn't the entire answer to happiness, but financial insecurity can make it much harder to enjoy life.
Worrying about whether you can pay the mortgage, afford groceries, cover an unexpected expense, or maintain your lifestyle in retirement creates stress that can overshadow other parts of life.
That's why retirement planning isn't just about maximizing your investment balance. It is about creating enough financial confidence that you can spend your time on the things that matter to you.
Instead of asking only:
"How much money will I have when I retire?"
also ask:
"What will my money allow me to do?"
That could mean travelling, helping your children, maintaining your home, pursuing hobbies, donating to causes you care about, or simply having the freedom to say yes to opportunities without constantly worrying about the cost.
Don't Build a Retirement Around Money Alone
A retirement plan can be financially successful and still leave someone feeling unfulfilled.
Imagine two people who both retire with enough money to support themselves comfortably.
One spends most of the day watching television, rarely sees friends, has no particular goals, and doesn't know what to do with their free time.
The other has a weekly schedule filled with family activities, volunteering, exercise, hobbies, travel, friends, and projects.
Their financial situations might be identical, but their experiences of retirement could be completely different.
This is why a good retirement plan needs both a financial plan and a life plan.
Experiences Can Be More Valuable Than Things
Another interesting area of happiness research involves how we spend discretionary money.
Research associated with Cornell psychologists Thomas Gilovich and Amit Kumar has found that people often derive more enduring satisfaction from experiential purchases than from material possessions. Experiences also give people stories and opportunities to connect with others.
That doesn't mean buying things makes people unhappy. A comfortable home, reliable vehicle, good computer, or other useful possession can absolutely improve your life.
The bigger lesson is to think about what your spending actually contributes to your life.
A $2,000 purchase that you use every day for years may provide tremendous value. A $2,000 purchase that sits unused in a closet probably won't.
Likewise, a memorable trip, concert, family gathering, course, or outdoor adventure may provide value that extends beyond the experience itself through memories and relationships.
Retirement Gives You Something Money Can't Buy: Time
One of the biggest advantages of retirement is the ability to control more of your schedule.
During your working years, your calendar may be dominated by work, commuting, appointments, children, household responsibilities, and other obligations.
Retirement can create enormous flexibility—but only if you actually use it.
Consider making a list of things you would like to do when you have more time:
- Travel to places you've always wanted to see.
- Spend more time with family and friends.
- Learn a new skill.
- Volunteer in your community.
- Exercise and spend more time outdoors.
- Take up a creative hobby.
- Work part-time or start a small business.
- Mentor younger people.
- Take classes or continue your education.
- Work on projects you've been putting off for years.
For more ideas, check out our 101 Best Ways to Spend Retirement .
How Retirement Planning Can Support Happiness
Financial planning cannot guarantee happiness, but it can remove some of the financial uncertainty that makes retirement stressful.
Understand Your Retirement Phases
Retirement isn't necessarily one long period with identical spending every year.
Your early retirement years may involve more travel, entertainment, hobbies, and other active pursuits. Later years may involve different priorities and potentially different spending patterns.
Understanding these phases of retirement can help you build a more realistic financial plan.
Build a Sustainable Income Plan
Retirement income needs to support your lifestyle while also accounting for longevity, inflation, investment returns, taxes, pensions, and unexpected expenses.
The Retirementize retirement calculator can help you explore how different assumptions affect your projected retirement income and assets.
Plan for the Unexpected
Even a carefully designed retirement can encounter surprises. Markets can fall, expenses can increase, health needs can change, and family circumstances can be different from what you expected.
Building flexibility into your retirement plan can help you respond to those changes without having to abandon everything you enjoy.
Five Questions to Ask Yourself Before Retirement
Financial projections are important, but consider answering these questions too:
- Who will I spend my time with? Think about how your relationships may change after leaving work.
- What will give my week structure? Consider activities that get you out of the house and give your days a sense of purpose.
- What do I want to accomplish? Retirement can be an opportunity to pursue goals you couldn't prioritize while working.
- What experiences matter most to me? Identify the travel, hobbies, family activities, and other experiences you want your retirement budget to support.
- How much money do I actually need for that lifestyle? Connect your lifestyle goals to a realistic retirement income plan.
Happiness Isn't About Having a Perfect Life
It's tempting to think that happy people have somehow figured out how to avoid life's problems.
They haven't.
Everyone experiences setbacks, financial challenges, health problems, relationship difficulties, and loss. A fulfilling life isn't one without difficult experiences. It is a life that contains enough meaningful relationships, purpose, enjoyment, and resilience to navigate those difficult periods.
That may be one of the most useful lessons to carry into retirement.
The Secret to Happiness May Be Simpler Than We Think
There isn't a magic formula for happiness, and no study can tell you exactly what will make you happy.
But decades of research point toward several recurring themes: meaningful relationships, purpose, physical and mental well-being, financial security, and time spent doing things that matter.
These themes also provide a useful framework for retirement planning. Your retirement savings are not the destination. They are a resource that can help you build the life you want.
Conclusion
The secret to happiness probably isn't one thing.
It is the combination of people you share your life with, the purpose you find in your days, the experiences you create, the way you take care of yourself, and the financial foundation that gives you freedom to make choices.
Retirement is an opportunity to put those pieces together. Instead of planning only for the day you stop working, think about the life you want to build after work.
Then make sure your financial plan is designed to support it.
If you're preparing for retirement, explore our retirement income and savings resources , learn about common retirement planning mistakes , and discover more ways to create a happy retirement .
